Comments on: Should I Stay Home or Go Back to Work?

By: Carla

Carla — Fri, 03 Oct 2008 13:36:18 +0000

I have been a stay home mom for over 20 years.

You never hear anyone say “I wish I had spent more time at work”…..but you will hear them say “I wish I had spent more time with my children.” They grow up so fast!! Trust me.

I am happy that I stayed home because my son passed away when he was 19. I have no regrets because I got to spend as much time with him as possible. Money isn’t everything.

I have a website that lists over 101 real work at home jobs for those that want to work and also want to stay home with their children.
http://www.stay-home-income.com

By: Marty Dorfman

Marty Dorfman — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 11:16:02 +0000

After turning 55 and fully vested in my company, I retired and have not touched my pension or 401K. Can I go back to work for the same company at a lessor salary and not affect my current pension? My pension is figured on my highest salary with this company and I do not want to lower this. I always hear of state and government employees retiring, earning a pension, then going back to work with the same state or government agency with another complete package.

By: Michelle Defreitas

Michelle Defreitas — Tue, 16 Sep 2008 20:26:01 +0000

I think motherhood is the best job there is as well as the most frustrating. I was blessed to be able to stay at home with my two kids. When my youngest turned 15 months I felt ready to get on and do something with my life. I had taken a year’s leave from my PhD studies after she was born as I could not cope with the two. But this break showed me that I was never really passionate about the PhD as I felt absolutely no motivation to return to it. Instead I started an online buisness selling fashion and accessories which gives me the flexibility I need to still be there for my kids and do something productive and lucrative as well. My son is at school fulltime and my daughter goes to nursery four times a week. It may not make financial sense yet in terms of the return on my investment or the fact that I have to pay nursery fees, but it keeps my brain ticking over and I know that I will make a success of it in time. For me it was important to find that balance between stay at home mum and working mum. It keeps me sane.

By: Mr. Mom Again?

Mr. Mom Again? — Wed, 25 Jun 2008 19:23:42 +0000

I am 40 & a father of four, they go from 14,12,10, & 8. I was Mr. Mom and loved it, I had my part-time bookkeeping business that did okay, but I was there for school pick-ups, plays, days off, hearing about their day…..then my wife\’s sister who is VERY sucessful in the business world wanted me to go into business with her and other family members. The potential is great and if I stay it would have an unbeliveable $$ associated, there is a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow but I miss being Mr. Mom. I miss having the kids fed, the house is good shape and projects up to date before my wife (who has a great paying job) got home. Everyday I sit here I want to be there. My wife wants me back home and I have this internal battle going on. I don\’t want to disappoint her family, my wife or my kids. I want/need a sign. I have offered it up, prayed, and begged for clarity but inside I am in turmoil. We would be \”okay\” if I stopped or went to PT, we don\’t have much in the way of savings but we survive. I doubt anyone would read this so maybe I am writing this for myself right now. Whenever I hear Cat\’s in the Craddle, Don\’t Blink, You\’re Gonna miss these days, on the radio I start to well up. 8 years I\’ll be 48, my youngest will be 16 where do I go from there? THAT is my BIGGEST issue. I\’ll be 2 years away from 50, what will I do then………….WHAT IS THE RIGHT ANSWER?

By: Modern Sage Online: New Traditions for Living Well - Women’s Health and Wellness Online Community » Welcome to the Carnival of Family Life

Mon, 18 Feb 2008 04:44:54 +0000

[...] presents Should I Stay Home or Go Back to Work? posted at My Dollar [...]

By: JHS

JHS — Sun, 17 Feb 2008 19:53:58 +0000

Forget the financial considerations. Which choice FEELS right to you? That's the most important thing. The rest will fall into place. Thanks for contributing this post to this week's Carnival of Family Life, hosted at Modern Sage -- Practical Living Blog. The Carnival will be live tomorrow, so please stop by and peruse all of the wonderful articles submitted this week!

By: LCG

LCG — Wed, 13 Feb 2008 15:19:10 +0000

I like your post, because I recently decided to quit my job, even though it is going to be financially very difficult for us. My boss pushed me to stay – even offering for me to work just 5 hours a week from home. However, I felt that I could not do my job adequately that way. Also, I think that these young years of my duaghter’s life (2) are precious, and I really felt like I missed out when working. I agree with the comments that say to focus on what you want, and then find a way to make it work. If you want to work – find a way that will make it balanced. If you do not want to work, find extra ways to save money.

That being said, I think you need to remember what you spend on gifts at work. I felt like I spent a lot of money buying fundraising candy bars, wrapping paper, and bday lunches. You know that it is very hard to say no to that stuff! I find I still spend money on kid’s birthday presents for parties, but at least I can get a away with less expensive things, like coloring books and crayons.

Best of luck in your decision. I can already tell that you are a great mom for weighing these factors so thoroughly!

By: Smart Spending

Smart Spending — Tue, 12 Feb 2008 19:16:47 +0000

A new mom’s dilemma: Stay home or go back to work?…

Those facing a decision about staying at home with a new child or returning to work could do no better than to read Madison’s personal analysis at My Dollar Plan. She figures in the obvious factors — lost pay, reduced work-related and child care expe…

By: Jane

Jane — Fri, 08 Feb 2008 16:08:52 +0000

I find this post extremely interesting b/c I just got finished reading the The Feminine Mistake: Are We Giving Up Too Much? by Leslie Bennetts. And it’s basically pointed at the question of women on career tracks opting to stay home or not (she is in favor of maintaining at least part time work.) (Note I am single, have a career and have no kids but I am 95% sure if I have them I will continue to work, although I feel guilty about leaving my pets alone for the day so that may change) On the other hand I am the product of a working mother. The one comment that I was offended by was the one about no strings attached smiles. I still gave them to my Mom and MY MOM WAS AND IS A GOOD MOTHER. I don’t feel my mother would have been any better of a Mom if she stayed home.

By: Frugal Babe » Archive » My Thursday Round-Up and Random Thoughts

Frugal Babe » Archive » My Thursday Round-Up and Random Thoughts — Fri, 08 Feb 2008 07:00:32 +0000

[...] Dollar Plan has a very complete post about staying home with kids versus going back to work. With our baby arriving in about three months, this is something that I’ve been pondering [...]

By: Oh Wait, There Were Other Carnivals This Week Too | I've Paid For This Twice Already...

Thu, 07 Feb 2008 16:47:55 +0000

[...] Dollar Plan: Should I Stay Home or Go Back to Work? Madison looks at the financial aspect of the decision as well as considering some personal ones and [...]

By: wealthy_1

wealthy_1 — Wed, 06 Feb 2008 22:37:46 +0000

This is a very difficult decision. I chose to stay home with my children, but not with the insight into finances, lifestyle, etc. that you have.

When my children were young, I had a multi-level marketing business. I would go out and do home shows in the evening once my husband got home. I went back to work outside the home when my daughter was 16 and my son was 11. I have never regretted being a stay at home mom. I’ve only regretted not having a plan.

By: Kelly Rigby

Kelly Rigby — Tue, 05 Feb 2008 12:47:51 +0000

I’m a first time reader and I was quite intrigued by this post. I agonized over this decision myself a few years ago, but in the end the agonizing was for nothing because deep inside I knew what I wanted to do.

So, although this is a very thorough and impressive examination of the issue, I think you’ve left out the most important consideration. What do you WANT to do?

What would make you happiest? Because a happy mum is a good mum. I truly don’t believe there is a one size fits all solution here. It can ALL be tough.

My friends who work full-time and have kids are constantly exhausted and spend a lot of time struggling with guilt, their husbands and feeling cranky because they have too many people to consider in their life.

But, being a stay at home mums means a life of kid talk, boundary testing and a sense that your brain has been replaced by mashed potato. Oh, and if you’re used to any sort of achievement and recognition at work, the invisibility of being “just a mom” to many people can take some getting used to. I thought the self employed SAHM option was the best compromise, but then the blurred boundaries between work and home make that a challenge too.

So, it all comes down to what vision do you have of your life and your family? How do you WANT it all to work? When you can answer this, the rest will fall into place. Don’t let fear make the decision for you.

Whether you stay home or go back to work, you have made the right choice as long as the decision is based on what is RIGHT FOR YOU. No one else. And no matter what, it will all work out with time. You’ve got a beautiful baby so you’re already blessed.

Good luck!
Kelly

By: Sunday Money Roundup - Superbowl XLII Edition. | My Two Dollars

Sunday Money Roundup - Superbowl XLII Edition. | My Two Dollars — Sun, 03 Feb 2008 15:02:30 +0000

[...] Dollar Plan asks the question “Should I Stay Home Or Go Back To Work?“…and follows it up with “Stay Home or Go Back to Work: The [...]

By: FFB

FFB — Thu, 31 Jan 2008 22:02:15 +0000

My wife and I have been toiling over this decision. She has gone back to work but we’ve been wondering if it’s really worth it. What makes it tough is my wife makes a good salary and we’d like to buy a home in the next year or so. It’s a shame it’s so tough to live off one salary nowadays.